The Truth About Motivation (And Why You’re Probably Chasing the Wrong Thing)

One of the most common things new clients say to me is this:
“I just don’t have the motivation.”
Or:
“I wish I was more motivated like everyone else.”

They look at people who train consistently and assume those people are wired differently. More disciplined. More driven. Better at life.

That’s not what’s going on.

Regular exercisers are not super motivated

Most people who train consistently are not bounding into the gym full of excitement. They’re not endlessly hyped. They’re not immune to tiredness, stress, bad nights’ sleep, busy jobs, or family life.

And yes—sometimes they actively don’t feel like training.

The difference isn’t motivation.
The difference is that they’ve removed choice.

They’ve built systems that make training non-negotiable

The people who “always manage to fit it in” have usually done some very unglamorous things:

• They’ve blocked time in their diary and treat it like an appointment, not a suggestion

• They’ve arranged childcare in advance

• They’ve committed financially

• They’ve put accountability in place (often a personal trainer)

• They’ve stopped relying on how they feel on the day

In other words, they’ve made it harder not to train than to train.

Once that structure exists, motivation becomes largely irrelevant.

Accountability beats willpower every time

Let’s be honest: relying on willpower at the end of a long workday is a terrible strategy. When you’re tired, stressed, and hungry, the sofa will always win.

This is exactly why I had a personal trainer for over a decade.

Not because I didn’t know what to do in the gym.
Not because I lacked knowledge.

But because it was the one system that guaranteed I would train that week.

I’d booked the session.
I’d paid for it.
I had a relationship with the trainer.

Walking away meant cancelling last minute, losing money, and letting someone down. That friction mattered. It stopped me from “just heading home” when work finished.

I didn’t need more motivation.
I needed fewer escape routes.

The irony: motivation shows up after you start

Here’s the part people miss.

Once you walk through the door, motivation usually follows.

Sessions are rarely miserable. There’s often laughter. Progress becomes visible. Strength improves. Mood lifts. Energy picks up.

You leave feeling better than when you arrived—often by a long way.

That’s why people stick with it. Not because they’re endlessly disciplined, but because the system gets them through the door, and the reward keeps them coming back.

Stop blaming yourself for a systems problem

If you’re telling yourself you “lack motivation,” I’d challenge that.

What you probably lack is:

• protected time

• external accountability

• clear boundaries around your training

• a setup that doesn’t depend on daily willpower

That’s not a character flaw. It’s a design issue.

Motivation is unreliable.
Systems are not.

Experiencing Shoulder Pain in Peri/Menopause?

Frozen shoulder

It’s one of the most common painful issues I see in many of my midlife clients.

It often starts with a client saying they’ve “tweaked” their shoulder. There’s no obvious injury, but suddenly certain movements hurt — lifting the arm forward and up, out to the side, or reaching behind the body (often noticed when trying to do up a bra).

What’s often happening underneath is inflammation around the shoulder joint. Over time, that tissue can tighten and stiffen, leading to reduced movement and pain — often worse at night. As the shoulder loses mobility, many women also start to experience neck or upper-back discomfort from compensating without realising it.

Frozen shoulder is far more common in midlife women, particularly between 40 and 60. Hormonal changes during perimenopause and menopause play a big role here — hormones like oestrogen help regulate inflammation and support joint and connective tissue health. When levels fluctuate or decline, tissues can become more sensitive and slower to recover.

What we do next depends on how long the symptoms have been there and how severe they are.

• If it’s early and manageable, we focus on gentle, controlled movement to maintain range of motion and see how the shoulder responds.
• If pain is severe or affecting daily life, I’ll always recommend seeing a physiotherapist or doctor for proper assessment and guidance.

A Personal Trainer that can support you through this process and help you on the road to recovery and is one of the best ways of ensuring you move through this and re-gain movement and reduce pain and inflammation.

Why my mum changed the way I think about ageing

Watching her lose her mobility after a hip fracture made me ask a hard question…..

What do I want my later years to look like?

Here she is, approaching her 94th birthday. Amazing, right?

But the truth is, the last eight years haven’t been easy. When my mum broke her hip at 89, everything changed.

That moment became a turning point for her — and for me too.

Our family history is full of women with fragile bones. Sadly, many experienced falls that led to serious fractures and shortened lives.

When my mum broke her hip, I booked a bone scan. The result? Osteopenia — early bone density loss. Not uncommon, but still a wake-up call.

Half of women over 50 will experience a bone fracture. So I knew this wasn’t just my issue. And as they say — information is power.

I knew I had to change things:
• Less sitting behind a desk
• More focus on building muscle strength
• Better nutrition (yes… more protein!)

Bone and muscle work together — they’re part of the same ecosystem. When you strengthen one, you support the other.

The good news? Its working. My most recent bone scan shows improvement, or no decline, across all key markers. And now I get to help peri- and menopausal women do the same.

My mum is my inspiration — but this journey is also about choice. I don’t want to end up frail or fearful of movement. I’m not interested in being “beach-body ready”.

I want to stay strong enough to travel, meet friends, lift bags, climb stairs — and live fully for as long as I can.

That’s what strength training really gives us 💪✨

Five things I learnt becoming a PT in my 50s

What I wished I knew when I made the change…

A midlife career change can feel both exciting and terrifying — especially if you’re considering changing careers in your 40s or 50s. Many women reach this stage of life feeling ready for something new, but unsure where to start or how realistic the transition really is.

When I stepped away from my previous career to retrain as a Personal Trainer in my 50s, I had no roadmap. Looking back, there are some key lessons I wish I’d fully understood before making the leap. If you’re thinking about a second career in midlife, these are five things worth knowing first.

1. Don’t Give Up Your Day Job Too Quickly

If you’re planning a midlife career change, avoid leaving your current role too soon if you can help it.

I initially left work to give myself space to reset and think about what I wanted to do next. That time helped me realise I wanted to retrain as a Personal Trainer. While I did some contracting work alongside my training, trying to retrain in a completely different career while starting a new contract created unnecessary stress.

A career change in midlife already requires mental, emotional, and financial energy. Removing financial pressure where possible allows you to make clearer, more confident decisions.

2. Spend Time With People Already Doing the Job

One of the most valuable steps when changing careers in midlife is learning from people already established in that field.

I was incredibly fortunate to have experienced Personal Trainers in the studio who allowed me to shadow their sessions, ask questions, and understand how the job works in reality — not just in theory. Watching how they trained clients, managed their schedules, and built relationships accelerated my learning enormously.

If you’re retraining in midlife, seek out real-world exposure. It will save you time, mistakes, and frustration.

3. Be Realistic About Time, Money, and Expectations

Many people underestimate how long a midlife career change takes.

I had no real understanding of how long it would take to build a sustainable client base — or how financially challenging the first year could be. I was lucky to have savings to support myself, but even then, it wasn’t easy.

I recently read that around 80% of Personal Trainers leave the industry within their first year. While I don’t know how accurate that figure is, I understand why it happens. My first-year income wouldn’t have covered my mortgage.

If you’re considering a second career, take a hard look at your finances and ensure you have enough set aside to support yourself during the transition.

4. Keep Learning and Define Your Specialism

Retraining doesn’t end once you qualify.

As part of my midlife career change, I continued investing in education, including qualifications in pre- and post-natal exercise and menopause. As a menopausal woman myself, I had to learn how to support my changing body — managing weight shifts, understanding the benefits of HRT, and adjusting my nutrition to sustain a physically demanding role in my 50s.

Your lived experience in midlife can become your strongest professional asset. Let it shape your niche.

5. Learn the Tools That Support Your New Career

Modern career changes require more than technical skills.

Social media, websites, online booking systems, and AI tools play a huge role in building a successful second career. I avoided this area for far too long, until working with a social media and website coach helped everything click.

As a coach myself, I know the power of guidance — and I wish I’d sought that support sooner. You don’t need to master everything, but you do need to engage with the tools that help your business grow.

Finally - Enjoy the Process (Even When It’s Uncomfortable)

A midlife career change isn’t a straight line.

Looking back, I’m proud of how far I’ve come — from retraining, to building a client base, to creating a website and writing this blog. There is still so much further to go, and that’s okay.

Changing careers in your 40s or 50s isn’t just about work. It’s about building a life and career that fits who you are now — and that, for me, has been worth every step.